Potty Training

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My daughter is finally potty trained!  I say that loud and proud because she was not easy to train.  My son on the other hand, was very easy.  Soon after his second birthday, he started expressing interest in the potty. He quickly responded to a simple reward system of getting a sticker each time he used the potty.  Within a couple of days he was trained! 

My daughter was a completely different story.  She is 28 months and has been expressing interest in the potty for quite some time.  I tried a reward system with her as well. It had worked for me before. It was bound to work again, right?  The stickers that worked for my son, did not motivate her.  Initially M&M's did the trick!  That lasted a couple of trips to the potty and she was done with them.  Then I tried offering a little lollipop!  That lasted a couple of trips to the potty and then she was done with them also.  I began to get frustrated.

I decided to take a break and go back to the basics.  Every time she dirtied her diaper I would ask her where does the pee or poop go?  When she would respond that it belonged in the potty, I would ask her to show me where the potty was.  If it was a diaper that had poop in it, I would place it in the potty and ask her to flush the toilet.  After a couple of weeks taking a trip to the potty every time she had a dirty diaper, she started sitting on the potty by herself.  I would tell her she did a good job sitting on the potty and left it at that.

This is where the shift toward her incentive to go on the potty began.  We are fortunate that my family lives in a beach community.  A few weeks ago I went with my children to pick up this season's beach passes.  They were very excited with the anticipation of going to the beach this summer.  My son was talking about going in the water, playing with sand toys and visiting the concession stand at the beach.  My daughter started getting excited.   I explained that there was only one condition we would go to the beach, and I promise this is true -  I will not go to the beach with my daughter still in a diaper.  I simply do not want to deal with the mess the swim diapers that just fill up with water until they burst.  Sand and diapers do not sit well with me.  Pure selfishness I know, but aren't we allowed to be a little selfish at times?  My daughter understood that loud and clear - amazing what they choose to understand when it directly affects their happiness.  She started asking me if she goes to the potty, then can we go to the beach?  We had this conversation for a couple of days.  Then one day a few weeks ago she came up to me and said that she was going to use the potty.  We went to the bathroom and she did!  Then she asked to go to the beach.  I had to keep my word.  Even though it was rainy afternoon, we all got in the car and drove to the beach.  That's what I promised her and that's what we did!   

I learned a lot from this experience.  Having two children who responded completely differently to potty training.  My son responded very simply to an easy reward system.  He was young also when he was potty trained, 26 months old.  I assumed girls would be easier to potty train and most anyone who I discussed this with agreed.  This certainly was not the case for us.  My daughter ended up being the complete opposite.  Rewards system did not work.  Positive praise did not work. In the end, when she was ready and really yearned for something, in her case going to the beach this summer, she was able to achieve this milestone!

What are your feelings on potty training?  Do you have a goal in mind for an age you'd like to  be diaper free?  Do you feel our society is too lax on potty training and should be introducing potty training earlier as other cultures do?