Everyone Is A Winner . . . I Don't Think So

This year my son was in chess club at school.  It really was a wonderful, well run program.  We went early to school every Friday morning for the opportunity to learn and play chess.  I would volunteer each week helping clean up the chess boards and pieces so I got a good sense of where my son was playing with respect to other children participating.  Let's say by the end of the year, he was right in the middle of the pool.  He definitely was not the best player, but not the worst either.

There were celebrations twice during the year of the club - once before holiday break and the other at the end of the year.  During the holiday celebration, there was a raffle to win mini prizes like travel chess or checkers sets.  My son was excited he was going to win a prize and I explained to him it was a raffle and the point of having a raffle is to randomly pick a winner.  Since there were 70 children in the club, I told him it was highly improbable he would win anything.  As the names kept being called and I began to play closer attention to the amount of prizes on the stage, I noticed EVERY child who participated was being called as a raffle winner.  To be honest, this surprised me a little.  I would have rather they bought each participant a small gift as a token of the holiday season and presented it as such - certainly not under the guise of a raffle.

At the end of the year there was a four week chess tournament.  Awards were presented to the players and as names were beginning to be called, I noticed that they were not for 1st, 2nd or 3rd place.  They began calling names with three way ties for 7th place.  Again, I have never witnessed such a thing.  The children who did not place 1st, 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 5th, 6th or 7th place- ahem, my son, were then called up to receive a Great Play Award.

My son doesn't participate in softball or soccer.  I had heard of clubs giving each child a trophy at the end of the season for participation, but my son has never been involved.  I didn't believe in that practice then and I don't believe in it now.  My son, as well as 99% of the other participants, did not play well enough to deserve a trophy or award.  I think it's okay for children to participate in sports and activities where they don't win at the end of the season.  Doesn't it teach them to try hard and play your best even if there is no prize at the end?

Growing up I participated in a bowling league - am I dating myself, and dance school.  At the end of year, awards were given for 1st, 2nd & 3rd place.  That's it!  I still had fun participating if I didn't win.  Watching others achieve those awards gave me something to come back and strive for the following year.  In dancing school they gave awards, not for the best dancers, but commitment to taking class and sticking with it for 5, 10, 15 years.

Trophies my Son has been awarded when he passes a test in tae kwon do.

What do you think?  Should each child who participates be acknowledged with an award?  Should we go back to the days when only 1st, 2nd and 3rd place were acknowledged?

photo credit: kevinthoule via photopin cc